Here are a simple set of three exercises that can be done by anyone, anywhere, and at anytime but will likely leave you seeing, thinking and feeling differently.
1. Making a difference.
At the end of every day we might want to ask ourselves:
How are we different today then yesterday?
Did we make a difference to anybody or anything?
What would we have done differently?
The first question is about our growth.
Did we grow today so we are different than yesterday?
The second question is about our impact.
Did we have an effect on somebody or something today so they came away better or different?
The third is about improvement.
What did we learn that make us better tomorrow?
If we ask these questions to ourselves every day (or every week or every month) it allows us to re-invigorate ourselves even at the end of tough days and in some cases signal we need to change our jobs, relationships or lives if the answers constantly indicate low growth, or limited impact or little learning.
Try the exercise and you may find it eye-opening.
2. What made a difference.
We are a sum of the decisions we made, the people we met, the things that happened to us and the chances we took.
In most lives just a handful of decisions, people, events and chances have made all the difference.
Understanding these are a key to a life.
Try answering these:
What three key decisions in your life have made all the difference? (eg. a partner, a job, a decision to leave a place or person)
What three people have shaped your life and/or career?
What three events good or bad have shaped you? (eg. health issues, financial windfall, accidents)
What are the three biggest chances you took that have determined where you are ? (eg. risks, betting on people, career re-inventions, moving locations)
In life a handful of decision, events and people determine where you end up.
Often though our lives are changed by other peoples decisions to hire us, help us, partner with us and we need to keep in mind that we have less control often then we might think.
In fact the two biggest drivers of a life are two draws of the lottery which we have no control over.
These are a) who we are born to and b) what country we are born in.
Winning the genetic lottery is often greater than any financial lottery.
One of the benefits of the “what made a difference” exercise is that when we ask others for their key three decisions, people, events or chances, we tend to form deeper connections and catalyze more meaningful conversations.
3. A different us.
What differentiates us?
One of the most interesting thing is to see people conflate themselves with their trappings.
If you are a senior person in a company is it you or your role, the company reputation or the money you control that people are admiring and genuflecting too?
So many people are shocked that when they leave or lose their position that they are no longer as relevant, sought after, pandered or curtsied to.
There is us the person.
And then there is us the objectified person empowered by another power source ( a company, a budget, a role) that we borrow from.
Important to remember the differences and to realize what will remain that is us after the role or job or position end.
It is a difference that matters a lot.
What makes you different that is uniquely you?
It is usually a combination of a special niche/skill, a voice and true stories that will always be yours.
To discover yours try this exercise…
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The opinions expressed here are the author's views and do not necessarily represent the views of MediaVillage.org/MyersBizNet.